When is the right time for “the talk?” This may be a talk that the older children dread just as much as the parents do. It may not even seem like the right time will ever come. But nonetheless, it must. There may come the time when you have to take action for your parents.
Here is an example: Roberta has become widowed. She has always been close to her daughter, Jeannie. Jeannie often spends time with her mother and they are very close. But Jeannie doesn’t realize until a few days after the passing of her father just how dependent her mother was on him. Jeannie knows she must talk to her mom about making the transition to an assisted living facility. But how will she do this? She doesn’t want her mother to think she is letting her down.
Jeannie decides to talk to her brothers. They all agree that they are worried about their mother living on her own. They have a lot of worries about her health and a lot of issues about her memory. They love her so much and want to make sure she is happy and has independence, but in a facility where there are trained professionals nearby both day and night.
Jeannie and her brothers all have families to take care of and careers they are involved in. None of them are able to give their mother the full-time care that she really needs. Yet she just didn’t know how she could bring up such a sensitive subject! The talk is hard to have, because it means change, and change is hard. Jeannie knew her mother had already endured the greatest change of her life: losing her mate.
It’s important to begin the talk by involving your parent and getting them to talk and be part of the decision-making process. Jeannie talked with her physician and got his recommendations as well, so she could feel confident in this decision.
She also talked with her mother and told her she wouldn’t be so lonely anymore, that there would be plenty of opportunities for socialization and doing crafts, which Roberta loves. For Roberta, she already had friends living in the assisted living facility where Jeannie thought would be convenient for her mother to live. It made Roberta feel like she wasn’t moving to a strange place, because there would be friends she already knew there.
Your situation may not be exactly like this one, and you know your parent better than anyone. But just remember; don’t give up before you even try. They may resist at first but sooner or later realize you are trying to do what’s best for them.
When researching options for assisted living facilities in Clear Lake, TX call us at (832) 315-3219. Assisted Living counselors at Serenity Gardens are available to talk with you about your caregiving needs while providing better, affordable care for you or a loved one.